random venting and kind of hard to read...
I dont know what it is, but I just feel like I'm too nice. And I mean I guess its not a bad thing, but sometimes it just pisses off that others aren't the same or they don't acknowledge it. I dont get walked on by any means, but I just put others first. If we have to drive and no one else will (or wants too), I will. It does piss me off being that of my roomies, 2 of us have cars at school but the other kid is so fucking stingy, he doesn't drive anywhere. Yeah we give him shit but he just doesnt get it. (random but he once gave a waiter a fucking 26 cent tip!! it was so embarrassing when the waiter asked what it was) This kid is one I've talked about before in how he is fake and acts Christian-like but its like a mask. And the thing is, I get a long with him like nothing is wrong. I honestly bottle up my emotions and what I think of others to myself so much that I feel like I'm fake. I dont think I am and I dont think others do either. Im honestly just a nice guy.
I think it does have something to do with me being gay. Im accepting of others and honestly am friends with anyone I meet. I will hang out with a person for a night and from then on, we will keep in touch. I talk to my friends friends that I meet randomly. My friends back home always say Im the nice one and will break the fights up.
Like tonight, me and my roomy (the one that I first told) have been in a fight for the past 2 days in which we havent spoken a word to each other. We get pretty heated over soccer cause we are both so competitive and it gets bad when we are playing against each other. But like our fights are stupid in my opinion. And it always ends up with me asking whats wrong and being the first to talk. I just left his room from seeing what was up and he said he thought I was mad at him which is fuckin stupid. yeah I was mad at him but whatever happens on the field stays there for me, it shouldnt carry over into our friendship off the field. He always carries it over and its hard cause we live together so its pretty awkward around the place when we arent talking.
1 week ago