Wednesday, November 16, 2011

another season down

Well another season is over. We didn't make it into the NCAA tourny which kind of sucks. I really just want to at least to make it to the first round. I guess I got one more season to make it happen which makes me feel extra weird being that I'm about to be a senior! I honestly don't know how I feel about that. On one hand, I want to get the fuck out of school but on the other hand, I like the sense of security I have here. I dont have much to worry about but then again, I kind of want things to worry about.

Just the feeling of being able to provide for myself is gonna be so sick. Getting a job and establishing my life will mean so much to me. I think about this stuff constantly. Where I will live, what I will do for work, what I will be able to feed myself haha, if I will stay in shape (i better!), my future partner, future family, being a uncle and a dad and a great family man. Its all generic stuff that affects how I will live but it all crosses my mind on a daily basis. A lot of times, I kind of want to just fast-forward my life so I can skip past these worries. Or at least somehow get a look at what I will be like in the future. Anyone else feel that way?

Some good news not regarding soccer is that I landed my internship. It defiantly isn't the one I wanted but I guess I have to take what I can get. Its for First Citizens Bank in Raleigh. So this coming summer my plan is to live here and go to work everyday. Its a paid internship which is always a plus and this will defiantly get me the hands-on experience that I want for my major...Other good news regarding soccer haha is that I could be going to England this coming summer. My college team is planning to take a trip there for about 10 days and travel to a couple cities and play exhibition games and train at some pro grounds. It should be so sick if it actually works out. I first need to tell my intern people that too haha

--And a professional soccer player came out the other day. David Testo played a couple seasons in the MLS and then went down a division. He was pretty successful but now kind of in search of a team. Here's the link to check out his story. I recommend it!


  1. Interesting article about David Testo. I hope the England thing works out. I studied abroad there back in college . . . loved it!

  2. Your worries sound so familiar. I spent my whole youth thinking about my future grown up life, the job I would have, the house I would live in ( I even made (childish) drawings of that when I was like 16 haha), my future wife(first)/boyfriend(later), having kids etc. I was so tired of stupid useless/ridiculous school stuff, small-brained/short-visioned classmates, and the general feeling of doing nothing usefull; in short I wanted to start real life. I have my 'real life' now, including a boyfriend, a house of my own, a job... but I'm still thinking bout the future and what my life will be within a few years (and at the same time regretting my collage time didn't last longer haha). This time it isn't about changing school into 'real life', but about changing my present life - were it's all about working, building and finishing the house/garden and keeping up the image of the smart guy that made it (not my words) - into a life that includes a real family life (with kids) and more time to spent with the people I care for. It feels like I'm always concerned about my future, like insecure in what direction my life will go and if I'm making the right decisions to let it go the way I want it to. I'll try to keep it short (not easy for me lol, but I saved a draft on this, so I'll better finsish it instead of writing it all here) but I'm telling this to explain it's probably some side of my personality (and maybe yours) to worry about the future, and not that much about school in particular.

    Your plan to visit the UK with your team sounds pretty dope. You won't get that chance again if you're working, so go for it!

    And nice story about the soccerguy

  3. Sorry, I did not see this post before commenting above. Well Kid. Lemme tell ya. Enjoy college. Life races forward after it. In this economy, you are getting a tremendous opportunity to have the paid internship. You are also getting a wonderful opportunity to see England and play the sport you love. Congrats on both accounts.