Well its been a while since my last post but thats mainly because nothing has really gone on. I guess the biggest that has happened to me was that soccer ended which blows. Ended about 3 weeks ago cause we didnt make it to the NCAA tournament. It sucks not making it then seeing other teams that we beat or tied made it through. We were good enough to make it but we just fucked up on stupid things.
Still only out to one person which is my roommate/teammate. Haven't talked to much about it just cause its not a big deal really. He doesn't mind it and it doesn't affect him. He acts the EXACT same way as he did which is cool. Still does really gay stuff that surprises me that he hasn't came out yet lol. I have debated whether telling two other teammates but just haven't got myself to bring it up. One of them I was going to tell but then he sent me a video from ebaumsworld talking about gays and stuff and he was like "wasn't that hilarious?" I just said "eh not really" then went on talking about something else.
Last week I was in "be alone" type of mood and didnt want to hang around my friends which made them mad but whatever. They would joke around with me but I wasnt in that playful mood to do that and then they would give me shit and I isolated myself for a couple of days. Like thinking about this stuff makes me feel alone and not connected with everyone else. I know they are my friends and I love chilling with them, but even when Im having fun, this gay stuff is ALWAYS on my mind. It occupies so much of my time just thinking about it. I honestly fucking hate it and which there was some way to get it off my mind. I thought telling one person would ease that but it hasnt. To some degree it has but I mean its still on my mind. I guess by telling my roommate, it just gives me an outlet to talk to someone in person but even if I talk to him, he still doesnt fully understand what its like.
We finally got off for Thanksgiving break which is sick cause I really need a break from school buttt Im not even going home. Im stuck at school :( It really sucks cause I want to go home so bad. I miss my family and my friends a lot! Kind of getting home sick.There isnt anything to do here at school either. Im not too sure what Im going to be doing all day since everything on campus is closed lol My friend left his room open so I could ps3 but I think that might get old after a couple of hours. Why cant it be summer already!! haha
Thats about it really, I will try to post more often. Hope everyone is doing well! Later people