Since being somewhat 'out' and reading so many coming out stories, it really has made me what to do more. Yeah, being openly out could have it negatives but I honestly feel the positives would out weight them. This is the thought that keeps me on the edge of telling people.
Just Sunday night, I told another person. Its the girl that has been helping me with some school work and also one that wanted to hook up with me a while back. I made it clear that it wasnt going to happen so my roommate took over the sex with her haha. (not sure I wrote about this, but she wanted to have the 3-some with me and my roomy) When I told her about me being gay, I explained that was the reason why the 3-some never happen and she was like "damn, so I never had a shot with you" It was pretty funny and she took it real well. She was happy for me and was so excited to be asking me all different types of questions. Some were awesome that had me and her dying laughing. This is the first girl at school that I've told and the next day at the library when studying, we both commented on this good looking guy that walked by. I also told her about EC (the kid I'm talking too for those who dont know), and she was super happy for me. She really wants to meet him too haha
But back to my main point...For anyone who reads this blog, its really just like an online journal to me but to others, I've realized people can relate to it and make connections with some of my stories/thoughts/feelings. I want to people to read it and make a connection with it. I want it to help someone even if its just one person. I know before I started mine, I read a bunch of blogs that I felt like were the exact thoughts and feelings that I had. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I really want to be out and be a good role model for the younger generations who struggle with themselves. It makes me sick to see what the government does when discussing bills about same-sex marriage and other issues within the gay community. Why the fuck should it be up to others if one couple can get married. Or if a certain group is discriminated against and nothing happens to those who do the damage. Is innocent kids killing themselves not enough evidence that something is wrong with this fucking country with dealing with these things. I know it took time for African-Americans to get freedom and rights but since that period, our culture has flourished. Not one bad thing has come from that. Why can't they relate those issues with the present day discrimination of gays. This shit is so fucking frustrating. It kills me cause realistically I can't do anything to change the minds of those who vote against gay bills. I honestly just want to help and show that being gay isn't a problem and you can live your life how you want to, and you should live your life how you want to!
Not sure if that made sense but its been a long 3 days this week already and when I get heated, its hard to write down how I feel... Well, hope everyone is having a great week!
1 week ago